Friday, July 25, 2014

What I Should Have Said...


I am an emotional person, who does NOT like to be emotional.  This is particularly the case when something, whether happy or sad, is going to make me cry.  So, I typically avoid it at all costs by either ignoring it, running away from it or covering it in sarcasm.  Apparently, this also applied to my sister's wedding.  I subconsciously covered every emotional moment in sarcasm or just flat pretended it wasn't happening.  In the end, I realized that I cheated her out of hearing what I really wanted to say when it came time for my toast.  So, for her and Marshall, and everyone else, here is what I should have said (and yes, I'm going to cry as I type)...



Kelly was blessed, or cursed, with having two mothers.  There is her mom, who actually gave birth to her and then there's me, the older sister, who has always felt an almost maternal need to protect her, watch over her and push her to be her best.  As her other mother, I'm not sure I ever really believed we'd see this day; not because Kelly has a fear of commitment (though there was a point we weren't sure), not because she didn't want it more than anything, but more because I didn't think anyone would ever be good enough and because I am selfish and didn't want to lose my time with her.
Over the years the guys have come and gone, some more serious than others, but, inevitably, they'd always be gone.  And, if I'm being honest, that's how I liked it.  But then, there was Marshall.  The first guy Kelly didn't try to push away, and the first guy who wouldn't run if she did.  There was all measure of critiquing from me, some of which Marshall heard first-hand and he still didn't run.  Then there's actually meeting the family and realizing that this family can often be a little more than you bargain for, and he still didn't run.  Of course there's Kelly's crazy side too.  Yes, even that, Marshall saw and was still hanging around.  I'm not sure when it dawned on me, but I remember it hitting me like a ton of bricks...this man loves her.  This man loves her like my dad loves my mom.  This man loves her like Robert loves me.  Most importantly, this man loves her the way SHE needs to be loved...what more could I ask for for her.  In return, she loves him...she loves him like my mom loves my dad, like I love Robert and I hope and pray that it's the way Marshall needs to be loved.
My marriage is one of God's greatest gifts to me and I hope, today and years from now, that Kelly and Marshall can say the same thing.
So, here's to the bride, my sister, my confidante and friend.  Here's to the new couple and a lifetime of faith, love, devotion, selfless giving and happiness. Here's to a new family, one I am excited and blessed to be a part of.  Here's to the new Mr and Mrs Connor.