Peer Pressure

It's so hard to imagine this sweet boy as a teenager.  As a matter of fact, it's downright frightening and I think about it as little as possible.  However, I know it is coming some day, and that some day will seem all too soon.

Collin has always been a very tenderhearted child.  He is (typically) compliant, though the eye rolling and huffing has started to accompany his compliance.  He submits to authority quickly and is usually a good listener.  Now, please don't mistake this for some angel child who never gets in trouble and always says, "yes ma'm."  He is still a child, and he is still a boy, but he has always been easy to correct.

These things have made raising him a lot more simple than if he were more stubborn, however they have always been a slight cause of concern.  As one who spent a few years teaching 8th grade I am very aware of what is to come.  I have been worried that Collin would fall to peer pressure easily, getting him into trouble that he didn't intend.  I have been concerned that a stronger personality could come along and convince Collin to do something that he may not have done on his own.

Now, I will admit that I did try to use this fear to my advantage.  Collin likes the water, but only as much as he feels in control.  He'll wade in up to his knees and that's good for him.  He'll splash, but not enough to get in his face.  So, this year I put him in group swim lessons thinking he would fall to the peer pressure and become comfortable jumping in the water and putting his head under.  I am quite certain that swim lessons were much more of a learning experience for me than they were for him.

Not only was Collin not "pressured" into swimming, but he didn't even trust the "authority figure" enough to do what she wanted him to do.  Now, he was not disrespectful, and he would follow her directions, but only to his comfort level.  The other children were jumping in, splashing, swimming and he couldn't care less.  It was almost as if he was looking at them thinking, "you guys are fools."  In the end, the swim lessons were successful, but not because of any amount of peer pressure.  They were successful because Collin was willing to do more the more comfortable he got in the water. 

It was an odd feeling of satisfaction for me.  While I was bothered that he didn't take off swimming with the others children or jump with them, there was this calm that came with realizing my child is not going to do anything he doesn't want to do.  At least for now we know this, if Collin does something he made the decision himself to do it.  There is a good bit of comfort that comes with knowing that.